我擔心我的工作狂會讓我走上老路~~~~

問：兩年前，有人向我介紹《奇蹟課程》，我也在本地的中心上了一些課。那時我一周工作六、七十小時，發現自己很難兩者兼顧。2003這一年，我過的很糟，不但失業，失去了我心愛的寵物，還失去了我的母親，我父親為此精神受了極大打擊，我對家裏弟兄姐妹的憎恨一發不可收拾，這時連憂鬱症也強烈反撲。我試著盡力面對這一切，結果不用說了，我怎麼盡力也處理不好。

Q #700: I was introduced to A Course in Miracles two years ago and took a few sessions at a local center. At the time, I was working 60-70 hours a week and found it impossible to combine both. 2003 was a bad year: I lost my job, my beloved pet, and my mother. My father fell apart; my resentment toward my sibling intensified dramatically; my depressions returned with vengeance. I tried to deal with everything the best I could. Needless to say, my best was not my best at all.

我對這部《課程》極其熱中，這又帶來了經濟上的兩難。因為失業的緣故，我這陣子基本上都是吃老本過活，現在儲蓄已經所剩無幾。我得回去工作，但我又擔心自己工作狂的天性，會讓我對工作過度投入，那麼可操練《奇蹟課程》的時間就更少了。我已多次拜讀你對問題169號的回答，在頭腦的層次上，我似乎懂了一點什麼叫做「由形式到內涵、由結果到肇因」；但要落實時，我就又混亂了。我非常希望能得到你的答覆與指引，讓我能夠盡可能平靜面對這樣的情況。

Yet my attachment to the Course is creating a financial dilemma. Since I lost my job, I’ve been basically living off my savings of which not much is left by now. I need to go back, but I am afraid that being a workaholic by nature, I will again get so involved with work, there will be very little room left for A Course in Miracles. I read your answer to Question #169 several times. On an intellectual level I am beginning to get sparks of understanding about the shift from form to content; effect to cause. But on the practical level, I am in a limbo. I hope very much to get your answer and your guidance that would allow me to handle this situation as peacefully as I can.

答：在你的情況中，還必須去看看其他一些層面，才能幫你解開目前的困境。至於工作與否這回事，看起來你目前沒有選擇的餘地。既然需要錢，在沒有其他收入來源的情況下，你必須回頭去工作。

只是這一次，你可以用不同的心態去工作。你不妨讀讀正文最後一章，裏頭有J兄很有用的提醒：「考驗不過是你過去未曾學會的一些課題，如今再度現前，如此，你才能在過去選錯之處重作一個更好的選擇，藉以擺脫舊有的選擇所帶來的一切痛苦。(T.31.VIII.3.1,2)」

如果過去你在妄心的支配下，用工作逃避正念之境的平安，那麼，現在重返職場，正是你「重新作個選擇」的機會。你可以把工作當作助緣，藉以瞭解自己仍是上主當初所造的模樣。在此之前，不妨先檢視一下你為自己定的罪，看看你是怎麼認定自己已非上主所造的模樣的。

例如，你認為自己是個「天生的工作狂」，所以你是自己性格的受害者，小我會告訴你，你完全無可救藥；但J兄對你卻有截然不同的看法，祂邀請你與祂一起接受這一事實：「你所營造的種種形相，抵制不了上主親自賦予你的真相。你無須畏懼那誘惑，只須看透它的真相：它只是一個讓你重新作選擇的機會，好讓基督的力量得以沛然降臨於你往昔塑造自我形相的每個境遇。因好似遮蔽了基督聖容的障礙，在祂的無上尊威前一無所能，在祂的神聖臨鑒下消失得無影無蹤。 (T.31.VIII.4.1,2,3)」

你不僅要把上述的觀念用在自己身上，還要以此眼光去看身邊每一個人。從這個角度與他連結（在心靈層面上，而不只是口頭說說），只要看出我們這一共同目標，你就已經在操練寬恕了。

A: There are a few more aspects of your situation that you might want to look to help break up the log jam. It seems that you have no choice regarding whether to work or not. If you need the money, then you have to go back to work if there is no other source of income in your life. But you can do it differently this time. Do you recall Jesus’ helpful reminder in that lovely final chapter of the text, "Choose Once Again"?: "Trials are but lessons that you failed to learn presented once again, so where you made a faulty choice before you now can make a better one, and thus escape all pain that what you chose before has brought to you" (T.31.VIII.3.1,2). If in your wrong mind you were using work to keep you from the quiet peace that defines you in your right mind, you can now look upon your return to work as an opportunity to "choose once again." You can decide that you will see your job primarily as a means of learning that you are as God created you, which means that you will look first at your conviction that you are not as God created you; that is, that you are "a workaholic by nature," a victim of your makeup, which your ego would tell you can’t be helped — it’s just who you are! Jesus sees you differently and invites you to join him, confidently acknowledging with him that "the images you make cannot prevail against what God Himself would have you be. Be never fearful of temptation, then, but see it as it is; another chance to choose again, and let Christ’s strength prevail in every circumstance and every place you raised an image of yourself before. For what appears to hide the face of Christ is powerless before His majesty, and disappears before His holy sight" (T.31.VIII.4.1,2,3). The idea would be to consider this not only for yourself, but for everyone else you associate with as well. In relating to others this way (in your mind, not verbally), you would be practicing forgiveness by seeing that we all share a common purpose.

你若能把注意力放在這個新「內涵」上，你的工作就不再是學習《課程》的障礙，它會帶給你相反的結果。

許多學員誤以為自己必須找個地方閉關，兩眼只能盯著《奇蹟課程》，或全天24小時只與懷有“奇蹟心志”的朋友或同事為伍，才算真正操練《課程》。這種想法與J兄對課程的用意可說是南轅北轍了。這個課程，最好的學習場所，就在日常生活中，包括工作、家庭、公民責任…。

感謝老天，藉著這些外境的反映，不斷讓我們看到自己究竟選了什麼思想體系。缺了這個反觀的機會，我們從何改變自己的心態？當我們操練練習手冊時，常常隔了三小時、六小時、甚至是三十六小時都沒想到當日的主題，這是我們學習寬恕自己最好的機會，我們會在其中學到最重要的寬恕功課：那些「小小的瘋狂一念」，沒有什麼影響，因J兄對我們的愛，不會因我們全然將他忘卻，而略減一分。如果我們真心相信這一點，根據J兄的時間觀，我們會在救恩道路上省卻千年的光陰。

In focusing on this new content, your job would no longer be an impediment to your learning the Course. It would be just the opposite. Many students think — erroneously — that they must be off in seclusion somewhere with nothing but the Course in front of them, or be with "Course-minded" friends and colleagues all the time in order to study and practice effectively. Nothing could be further from what Jesus intended his course to be. This course is best learned in the midst of our daily routines — work, family, civic responsibilities, etc., for in those circumstances we, thankfully, are presented with innumerable opportunities to have reflected back to us what thought system we have chosen; if we are not aware of that, we have no basis for changing our minds. And in learning to forgive ourselves when we discover that three, six, or thirty-six hours have passed since we last thought of the lesson for the day, we are learning perhaps the most important lesson of all: that the tiny, mad idea had no effect: Jesus’ love for us is not lessened one iota because we forgot all about him. If we truly, truly believe that, we will be saving thousands of years on our Atonement path, to use Jesus’ perspective of time.

你在2003年，上演了一整年的受害者／加害者的悲劇戲碼。如果你能夠試著把自己提升於（心靈）戰場之上，以寬恕的眼光俯視這一段滄桑史，也就是我們平常所說的與J兄聖靈同行，你會認出小我的目的，看見小我如何為你的生活帶來各式各樣的痛楚。你會看見自己在戰場上的形象是那麼的虛弱不堪、沮喪痛苦，這就是小我要你相信的自己，它要你把身體、問題、煩惱、慘劇緊抓不放，絕不去看J兄給你的愛與平安。

你一旦自我提升到（心靈）戰場之上，你才有重新評估的機會，是否要讓小我得逞？你知道你還有其他的選擇餘地。

And if you could also practice raising yourself above the "battleground" (in your mind) — all of the victim-victimizer situations and tragedies of 2003 — and look back down on it through the eyes of forgiveness, which is what it means to join with Jesus or the Holy Spirit, you would recognize the ego’s purpose in having your life be filled with that kind of pain. You would see yourself as a figure on that battleground, weak and battered, depressed and despairing — exactly where the ego wants you to wind up, because then you are obsessed with your body, problems, and tragedies, and the love and peace of Jesus are nowhere in sight. But above the battleground (in your mind), you would be able to re-evaluate your acceptance of this ego purpose and know that another choice is available.

最後還是要提醒一件事，找一位擅長處理工作成癮問題的治療師，能夠幫助你一同面對這一問題。J兄也推薦這些折衷作法，他希望我們對自己好一點，在學習和操練寬恕時，不要忽略我們身體和心理上的需求(See T.2.IV.3,4,5.)。此外，不妨參考一下問題74和246中所提的類似問題。

Finally, it may be helpful to you to work with a kind therapist who is skilled in dealing with addictions such as workaholism. This compromise approach is actually recommended by Jesus to ensure that we will be gentle with ourselves and not deny our bodily and psychological needs as we do our inner work of learning and practicing forgiveness. (See T.2.IV.3,4,5.) Other students have had similar work-related concerns, which are voiced in Questions #74 and #246.